Advice from Baby

I'm The Beast, Mighty Mo and ever so rarely... Little Lady. My Sis calls me Lates and Daddy calls me Precious. Mom calls me Base Jumper. You can just call me embarrassed because Mom is doing that ridiculous thing where she goes all "Look Who's Talking" and speaks for me. I will have my revenge. When she gets older I'll send her to the budget nursing home, eat up all her applesauce and use her false teeth and her polka dot toe socks to put on puppet shows for the other residents. The problem is I'm fairly certain she will dig it. My mom is just crazy like that.


So anyways I'm here to tell you that these four fabulous teeth didn't come easy. The fun and cheap thing mom does for me is quarters a fresh pineapple and then slices off pieces of the hard core. The core is really tough and I can gum them for hours, especially if she freezes them. They are the perfect size for my chubby hands and I will not share. Don't beg. I'm serious. You aren't getting any. I'm a baby remember? We don't GIVE away anything, EVER. But I will share a tip..pineapple is best grass dipped and dirt seasoned. Try it.


Now if you don't have any fresh pineapple then a bacteria covered, splinter giving stick will work just fine. Just trust me on this one.

Now for your advice... How do I get ALL the toilet paper off the role in under ten seconds? I can do it under fifteen but I need to speed up my game. Is my mom done yet? Can I look now? Is it safe?

Head over to 7 Clown Circus for Wordful fun

or....

We Are That Family for Works for Me tips and advice.

Two Cents and A Winner!!

This is very exciting because I get to custom create all the goodies I send your way. The winner is.... Kaylan.

Now I haven't honored a Comment Queen lately and this entry from Dee in my comment box caught my eye...

"I JUST found out this week that they were wrong and I am actually having a little girl and NOT another boy! I am over the moon excited and will be taking TONS of pictures of her. I bought a Rebel with my son b/c taking pictures at home is less stressful than going and having them done and they end up better.This would be an absolutely amazing thing to win!And there are so many great auctions...how to choose just one? I guess if I had to..I'd go with the Custom Boutique Angels Charity Lemonlime Lil Peas!Thanks for the chance!"

Her comment was so full of joy I thought my comment box was going to pop with excitement. So she is an official Comment Queen for sharing such joyful news. Plus I love her two cents on photography and portraits. So she will be getting a little surprise too.

Now for my Two Cents. I have been spreading myself very thin. Between family, friends and charity there is little left over for me. I still have not even managed to find time for that sexy haircut I've been planning, shave my ankles or submit any new poetry for publication. I strongly believe that my daughters are learning from me. They will either become me or marry someone like me and I want them to learn how to take care of themselves as well as others. Today my princess said to me, "I want to grow up so I can have a darling like you" I loved it. I melted. She is my darling. I am honored that she wants to be just like me. It reminded me that I need to work very hard on being a woman worth becoming. After today, I will be posting Two Cents Tuesday on just the first Tuesday of every month. Maybe by May I will have written something other than a blog post, painted my toes and actually USED my razor. Maybe. Please link up and share Your Two Cents or ask for some!

Glitter Critter!

Pet Entry

Yes, our cat is sprinkled in purple glitter. In a house packed with everything princess NOTHING remains glitter free. Our pretty kitty endures an occasional dusting of purple sparkle from her favorite little ladies.

Kid Entry

Meet little Ms. M. She was my daughter's first bestfriend and the first person I ever camera stalked beside my own two daughters. She mastered the perfect pout before she even turned three.


This week's theme on I ♥ faces are two of my favorite things, pouting and pets!

Giveaway Last Call

If you are here for the custom accessories and photo prop SURPRISE giveaway please CLICK HERE. Winner will be drawn Monday night Hawaii time.

The Boutique Angels are a group of designers that join forces twice a year to create for a cause. This week the auctions benefit The Children's Tumor Foundation. There are a range of items from custom twirl skirts to an adorable pin cushion offering free shipping and 100% donations to The Children's Tumor Foundation.

TO BROWSE AND BID ON ALL THE FUN CHARITY LISTINGS PLEASE CLICK HERE

I rarely post about my designs but I will spam for charity. My charity listing is a custom created tutu dress fit for a princess custom sized infants to toddlers. You can choose any color or color combination. As a special thank you for purchasing my charity listing I will add any accent you like to your dress (shells, marabou feathers, roses etc..) and throw in a matching hair clip or floral headband. Just let me know that you are a bloggy friend if you are the winning bidder.

I have included some pics of past designs for a look at just some of options for the winner. Please don't feel limited to past designs. I would love to create something unique and special just for your princess.

I will happily arrange a charity auction year round with a percentage of the donation going to any Giving Works charity of your choice. Feel free to contact me for details.

Charity Auction MVP

If there were awards BowzNStuff.
just might take home charity auction MVP. THIS adorable charity listing has started a bidding frenzy that stands to bring in a ton of dough for The Children's Tumor Foundation. It is an adorable custom cherry themed creation and she will happily design it, sew it and create just for your sweet princess. The wonderful thing is that the designer is as fun and generous as she is talented.

And please don't Forget to enter the Surprise Give Away celebrating the charity auctions. You could win a surprise package of TuTu's Bliss custom accessories and photo props.

To Enter:

One Entry:CLICK HERE and take a look at the amazing auctions raising money for CTF then blog back over and let me know your favorite item in the comment section.

Second Entry: Post about the charity auctions, giveaway or both and post the link in my comment box. Spreading the word means so much to me. There are still several adorable auctions under $20 dollars.

Thank you for entering and for helping shed light on a great cause!! Ships within the United States or to APO/AE only please.

The little girl who inspired the group of designers painted an adorable painting and it is now selling for over $80!!!! Kate's Painting is so inspirational. She is such a strong and giving princess.

Spreading the Linky Loving

Please CLICK HERE for contest details and to enter the surprise giveaway before you go.

This is the day I get to be free with my Linky Loving so if you have time to spare laughing, loving and spreading warm fuzzies get comfortable. If you are fighting a strong bloggy addiction and on the road to recovery RUN! Run now, run far and run fast.

Some of my favorite bloggers had me laughing even in the midsts of my full frazzle day.

I loved this post, Be on the Look-Out for...

And Jenners kept me calm and entertained with her games and Easter Bunny humor. My life was incomplete until I came across this post by Ronda,The Shelf Life of Boobies

A round of hugs and laughs for my fellow frazzled moms today. Who else is having one of those days? Today I straightened half my hair before the baby decided to toss herself over the edge of the empty tub and slide the porcelain slope like a human luge. She popped up laughing but I was so frazzled that I unplugged the straightening iron mid-frizz and left the house half curly. I also offended photobucket in some mysterious way and our truce has ended. It is holding the adorable collage I made for the charity auction hostage at an undisclosed location. In it's place is an ugly void that refuses to be filled. I have tried to curse the empty photobucket space into submission but the ugly void remains and my pretty collage is still missing. If there is anyone trained in hostage negotions around here? Feel free to visit THE TUTU AUCTION and enter hostage negoations for the release of my collage.Funny Linky Loving inspired by...

Sarah @ The Bowl

Publishing Tips

Quality Ezines are the best bet for beginners. Otherwise you need to front the cost for sample copies just to determine if you and the publication are a good match. If you submit your work to unfamiliar publications you will just waste your postage. You risk getting published in a poor quality publication and wasting the first publication rights to a great poem or story. Research before submitting. There is a place for quality mommy literature on-line over at Literary Mama .

I have found Rhino and Calyx to be female friendly print publications. Both are very high quality. Be sure to only submit your best work.
The most important tip is be prepared for rejection. Don't give in to writing to impress a certain editor or publication. Instead find the publication that is already compatible with your style and subject matter. The best way to do this is to find a writer you adore and see where they have published or if they may be sitting in as a guest editor. Published authors often guest judge for writing competitions. You have to think of rejection as a matter of an editor's taste and not as an insult to your work. Good Luck!

Poetry Crash Course:

Write a poem with a noun in every line. Make sure there is something that can be touched, tasted or felt in every line. Beginning poets tend to be heavy on adjectives and adverbs and skimpy on nouns and verbs. Very few literary journals publish rhyming poetry. However, there are special interest publications if rhyming is your passion. Poet's Market is a good resource for finding speciality publications.

Works for me! Check out more Works For Me Wednesday ideas at We Are That Family.

Look Mom! No Flash!!

This is one of my favorite pictures of my oldest daughter.

Don't forget to go check out I ♥ Faces this week to enter your own flash free photos and look at some of the most stunning and adorable pictures!

PHOTO PROP SURPRISE

GIVEAWAY!!!!
Now for your surprise!! In honor of the charity auctions supporting The Children's Tumor Foundation I am giving away a photo prop package. It includes over fifty dollars of boutique hats, portrait pacifiers, floral clips and other fun picture worthy goodies fit for a princess fairy photo session!!! I will be custom creating every item so it is sure to be just perfect for the winner.

To Enter:
One Entry:
CLICK HERE and take a look at the amazing auctions raising money for CTF then blog back over and let me know your favorite item in the comment section.
Second Entry: Post about the charity auctions, giveaway or both and post the link in my comment box.

Thank you for entering and for helping shed light on a great cause!! Ships within the United States or to APO/AE only please.

Time for Your Two Cents

Time to link up and share some two cents.
For a complete list of details and FAQ just Click Here

My Favorite Two Cents last week came from Sarah @ The Bowl. She gave her two cents on the "man role". The "man role" in my house is lawn car and filling the car with gas. Hubby is happy to shoulder the burden in exchange for never having to give the girls a bath or perform ponytail making acrobatics. I know. I know. I am a poor excuse for a feminist. Any traditional "man roles" in your house?

This Weeks Topic is Giving or anything else your heart desires!

My two cents on giving is that you have everything to gain from giving to others. The warm fuzzy feeling alone will make your time and energy worth it. There are so many people in need and wonderful organizations to help you spread love and kindness. Time is just as valuable as money. If you don't have money to spare then donate your time or talent. You can even offer blog support to a non-profit. I would like to introduce you to a princess proving you are never too young to give.

Kate is helping spread awareness of neurofibromatosis by sharing her story. She also painted "Rainbow of Hope" to be auctioned off on the eBay wide charity auction benefiting The Children's Tumor Foundation

Kate's Painting is now open for bidding HERE

Not Me!

In four short years I have not fallen from my good mommy pedestal. I have not gone from baking carrot cake sweetened with fresh fruit juice to a boxed cake mix with enough artificial dye to color the entire ocean rainbow. The smile on my daughters' crumb colored faces did not make every grain of sugar and drop of dye worth it. If I did make these unhealthy treats they would not be leaning but stunning and perfect in every way and I would NEVER love eating them just as much as the kids. It is time for Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. Just head on over to her blog to join in and dish on all the things you have NOT been doing. MckMama is going through a very serious time right now. Please blog over and send her your hugs and prayers.

This week is a HUGE charity event. All week designers will be listing charity auctions on Ebay with 100% of the donations going to The Children's Tumor Foundation . To look at the charity auctions please CLICK HERE and don't forget to check back throughout the week as more items are added.

I just listed a custom designed tutu dress with a .99 cent starting bid!! I will also be revealing a fun give away in celebration of the charity event. The Two Cents topic is "GIVING" but you can always give your own brand of two cents on any topic you like. Mr. Linky Posts tonight.

Fairy Mask Instructions

You will need:
A Hot Glue Gun
Fake Leaves (I prefer rose leaves)
Satin Ribbon
Flowers and Crystals (optional)
First pull off the plastic backs of several leaves. This will make them easier to work with and softer.
Arrange them around until you like the design. I measured the space between my daughter's eyes and made a few adjustments right before gluing.
Lift each leaf one at a time and apply a thin line of hot glue where the leaves overlap. When the entire front side is glued flip it over and glue three strips of ribbon on both sides for the ties.
Then cover the glue and strings with another leaf on each side. The ribbon is sandwiched between two leaves.
I accented the front with two cherry blossoms and my daughter chose heart centers. I would have went with dainty flat back pearls but it IS her mask. You can add glitter, line the eyes with crystals or anything her heart desires.

My camera shy little loves masks. Give her a mask and she goes from blushing darling to camera diva.

Leaves create the most realistic fairy costumes. So save them! Once you have enough you can create magical leaf covered photo frames, gift boxes or even complete fairy costumes.

A very special thank you to Red Bird Photography for sharing this amazing shot of the leaf fairy wings I designed for her fantasy fairy sessions. I hope you have a magical day!!

If you're looking for Works-For-Me Wednesday, you can find it over at We Are THAT Family. You will find some great tips and my favorite thing about today is...

Wordful Wednesday posts at Seven Clown Circus!

Your Two Cents Please

Time to link up and share some two cents.

For a complete list of details and FAQ just Click Here

I would love your two cents on time management.

Somewhere between laundry and peekaboo my girls grew. It seems this year they both hit the NOS button and leaped into girldom. Our littlest is getting leaner and lost her baby stumble. Is it just my little or do all second children travel at warp speed?

Big Sis starts school this year. She's leaving story time and the cuddling bend of my arm for a school desk and a pack of pencils. It was not long ago she was being womb jiggled as I jumped on the bed screaming "We're pregnant!".

This sudden awareness of time has made me anxious to manage my time more efficiently. Any ideas? Do you have any two cents to dish out today?

My two cents .......I wanted, wished for and prompted each new stage of my oldest daughter's development. Just savor each stage before encouraging the next step.

Thanks for sharing and joining in. Hugs, Jen

The Bald. The Bold.

For about five bucks you can pick up a glossy woman's magazine.....
For your five bucks you will get the scoop on the latest ground breaking diet. It's probably named after an exotic fruit, berry or veggie and translates to, "eat more fiber, crap yourself skinny". You will learn a celebrity is too fat and another is too skinny. All of them have had plastic surgery and a dose of infidelity. You will learn that sex burns calories but they will call it "sexercise" and add some glossy pics so that you think it's something new. You will learn exercise and lip gloss cure depression. That pretty much sums up the entire magazine but I better throw in a picture of a hot guy for good measure...

It just doesn't get any sexier than a man turning his head into a fundraising project that raises money to help fight cancer. Sorry Vin, you've been replaced. You're smoking hot status is being taken away and redistributed to Jay over at Halftime Lessons. Please don't cry Mr. Diesel. There is always next year.

Now you can take that five bucks I just saved you and donate it to a good cause and enter for the chance to have your blog advertised on an eye catching canvas all at the same time. I don't know about you but I can't think of any place I would rather see my blog advertised than Jay's generously bald head.Or you can go ahead and buy that magazine and I'll tell you, "I told you so".

Bubbles! Bubbles! Last Call!

"HMMMMM......what to do? What to do?"

"TASTE TEST!"

This is your last chance to enter the bubble photo contest!! This is a fun contest and my girls loved taking pictures for it. Join in and enter over at

Angela's Adventures and Minor Mishaps.

The bubble session resulted in a ton of great pics but these were three of my favorites. If you haven't done a bubble shoot yet you should. It was too fun and too cute.

Friday Fragments

Starbucks has yanked the Toffee Crunch bar right out from under me and they won't return my phone calls. The guy who works the morning shift is going to file a restraining order if I don't stop showing up begging for him to bring back the sugar loaded goodness. He knows something, I know he does.

Taco Bell stopped offering the Bacon Smack Taco. Did anyone else get to try it before they pulled the plug? It was a crunchy taco with an outer flour tortilla adhered together with a paste of bacon and nacho cheese. Hungry?

I know how to make a dish created entirely from bacon.

Please Note:I like to think of the jiggle in my wiggle as Filet Mignon, not fat.

It's time for Friday Fragments over at Half-Past Kissin' Time. Just gather up some bits and pieces in one post and link up. Click below for some great fragments and to join in. She is also gathering a list of pet peeves so don't forget to email her the number one thing that gets under your skin!

I Got Your Funny!

Thoughts from the Toilet Bowl has a wild little bit called "Show Me the Funny." It doesn't have to be something you have written but may have seen on another blog....

So don't be stingy with the laughter. Share the funny and don't blog too close to the outlets while browsing unless you are the Kegel master. I don't want to have to rename any of you Sparky!!

Beaver Tails is one of my favorite posts. Midwest Mommy is just hysterical. She gets me every time. This week she was giving women everywhere a chance to win the ability to pee standing up.

Her "You Go Girl" giveaway is so funny. Want to enter? OOPS, I THINK IT IS TOO LATE! But the real prize is learning about the Shewee and The Go Girl and it is never too late for a lesson in peeing vertical. Women everywhere can beat years of toilet seat oppression! Check it out, "You Go Girl" giveaway.

My new favorite blogger..
Cristin over at Tiptoeing Through The Tulips. She makes me laugh. That isn't too hard. However, making me go from crying, to laughing and back to crying at warp speed is a gift. She is open, honest, funny and brilliant. I am humbled by her posts. She goes beyond funny and manages to dish out laughter and raw honesty in the same breath.

If blogs were peppers I would give both these ladies a Chipotle rating. They have their spicy moments but they keep things pretty tame. Cristin even has a sexy poster of that famous Twilight hunk on her blog. HEY!! WHERE DID EVERYBODY GO?!?!?!

Fine go drool over hot vampire abs. I'm off to shop for my new

Go Girl FUD anyway

(Female Urination Device) Hee Hee

OOPS! Wrong Fudd!

Wordless

I'm feeling a little like this today... So I've linked up at Extraordinary Mothers for some wordless relaxation!

And if you like your photos with a dash of conversation Angie has some wordful fun going on today over at

The Winner

The prize goes to Kathy

The Two Cents that won her the photo prize package...

a wonderful post about positive thinking.

The post was the perfect example of great Two Cents. Kathy offered a great opinion topped off with an upbeat take it or leave it attitude.

I am not new to Kathy's blog but this post added a new dimension to her blog for me. No matter the subject matter of her posts there is always an undercurrent of joy.

It was a hard choice to make. Browse the comment section and click through the links if you doubt me. You all did not make it easy. If you were so excited about entering contests yesterday that you missed out on giving Your Two Cents, it is never too late to join in.

There were some great posts and I received some wonderful two cents on making the transition from Chewy to Sexy. Shelli from

I'm Too Busy To Blink...And I Need A Pedicure... is my new hero. She sent me a link to a great style and now I just need the nerve! Don't let her toes fool you, she is an insightful Beauty Queen and now joins the ranks of the official Comment Queens . Shelli is a fun little party in your comment box so blog by and invite her over for some cyber snacks.

And if you are mad that you lost then you should click below and read Melissa's Two Cents about losing. See! Everyone here is a winner. The winner gets great stuff and the rest of you get life lessons in losing. No need to thank me! Thank Melissa.......

PSSSST! I have a secret..... none of you are losers. I still have some very great, fun and exciting FREE things up my sleeve. I am so excited to show you but it is HUGE and is going to take some work. I think you all are going to love it. Anyone want to guess what I'm up to?

Your Two Cents Pretty Please

In the spirit of two cents and SITS Spring Fling the person who gives the best two cents TODAY will win a custom collage and photo editing services.

TO ENTER:

Just leave some advice/ two cents on ANY topic in the comment section or create a Two Cents post on your own blog and sign Mr. Linky. This week's OPTIONAL theme is "Choices".

PRIZE DETAILS:

The winner can send me up to a fifteen photos and I will chose from them to create a custom collage and edit the pictures. The collage and enhanced photographs will be sent to the winner in digital format via email. So if you have an email and the ability to open jpeg files this contest is for you. Here is an example of a simple collage I created for my own ballet princess. The photo collage/invitation/ announcement or banner will be custom created with the winner's style and special requests in mind such as design and text. PLUS The Secret Is In The Sauce will be giving away prizes every hour AND lots of ladies from around the blogland will be doing giveaways!!!!

NOW FOR THE TWO CENTS:

I can never make choices. I am the master of indecision. I could ask for your two cents on everything from my daughter's schooling to time management and bounce back even more confused. So instead of asking for your advice on something profound or thought provoking I have one simple question.....

What should I do with my mess of a hair? I would love your two cents because I have been channeling Chewbacca so long that I can't even figure out what to do with it. Blonde, brunette..both?! If you have a link to a certain style/color that would be great too.

You can link up your two cents anytime but only comments and posts from TODAY will be considered for the prize. Please share your two cents and sign Mr. Linky. The Rules are flexible, loose and optional but if you don't believe me just Click Here for all the details .

I SPY A HEART

This week's theme at I ♥ Faces is "Creative Crop." Do you spy the hearts? It wasn't until cropping this photo for the contest that I even noticed.

Heart #1: Look at the tilt of their heads

Heart #2: The rocks behind them form a heart pattern

Still can't see Heart #2? Maybe this creative crop will help....

(Adult Entry)

I loved this picture of my sister and her husband before but now I adore it. It went from being a fun picture to a very magical photo. I can't wait to point the hearts out to my sis. Join in on the fun and enter the I ♥ Faces contest.

www.iheartfaces.blogspot.com

Frantic Friday

UPDATE: Yes, THE EIFFEL TOWER.

I guess I will have to make it harder next time. ;)!Any Guesses where this photo was taken?

Friday is full of great blog carnivals. How do you decide? What is your favorite? In the spirit if Friday High Five ......this post is packed with FIVE extra places to link up and visit some great bloggers. What else am I missing out on? I am compiling a weekly blog calendar. If you would like me to add you to the list just leave me a comment and let me know what day you post Mr.Linky.


Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

Just post a question to join in on Aloha Friday, hosted by An Island Life!

Sarah's Kid Friendly Friday is a fun place to share tips and snag some!

And this weeks Two Cents topic is choices! This topic is not my strength (obviously) so I will be asking for your two cents and advice this week instead of giving it! I hope you join in. Mr. Linky goes up on Monday night, Hawaii time.