WARNING
I will continue to celebrate motherhood. So if breasts, birth, dilation and mother's milk makes you uncomfortable please consider yourself warned.
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Sunday, February 15, 2009

The Breastache

I did NOT google "nipple hair" for the reassurance that I am not the only one devolving into a hairy cave woman. I did NOT breathe a sigh of relief when I found that a touch of breastache is fairly common.

Now if your breastache is more Joaquin Phoenix than Clarke Gable...

you might want to Google "polycystic ovary disease" because a sudden and severe attack of breastache can be a sign of excessive "androgen".
Now aren't you glad I did NOT launch my own investigation of the breastache and then subject you to it?
CLICK HERE for a great resource on the breastache and hair removal.

Get ready to hand out some free two cents. The Two Cents topic is maintaining sanity while parenting, parenting while crazy or anything else you have some two cents on. As always topics are optional. Two cents is free and I never complain about FREE stuff! I hope you stop back by later and link up!
Now excuse me I am off to pluck my…..eyebrows. YEP, that's it. My eyebrows!!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

26 comments:

The Rambler said...

That was so awesomely hysterical...I'd be dying right now if Joaquin was there instead of Clark :)

Mary Teresa said...

Excuse me while I giggle to myself for a minute. It was the full breast facial hair that did me in. =D

Midlife, menopause, mistakes and random stuff... said...

What is happening to Joaquin Phoenix anyway????? Does anyone know what is going on with him? I saw him on David Letterman the other night and thought WTF??????
Great post. Hilarious as always :)

Steady On
Reggie Girl

annie kelleher said...

breastache??? ouch!!! the idea of removing hair from around my nipples makes my boobs ache just thinking about it!!!! thank goddess i was spared the breastache!!!!!

Hillbilly Duhn said...

The nipple mustache has been a great funny around my house all weekend. My husband complains he wishes he had more, while I wish I had none...LOL

Amy said...

LOL you crack me up. I have a lone straggler every once in awhile and it discusts me totally. BTW I was nice and tagged you today. Hey we have to stick together right? LOL

Bee and Rose said...

I did NOT laugh hysterically while reading about the breastache that you do NOT have! lol!!!

I knew this would make a fantastic posty! My sister and I giggled over the word breastache all weekend! I'm afraid to see if I have one..or two! It was bad enough discovering the perimenopausal mustache and then yesterday I saw my "beard"!!! AHH!

Jess said...

That's good!
I have a friend who's closer to Joaquin. But she's trying to get it straightened out!

Amy said...

Have a great day. When do you do the two cents thing?

namaste said...

Oh gosh, thank God you are only plucking your eyebrows. You had me scared for a minute!

♥ Kathy said...

LOL :D

Bridget said...

OMG!! I think I just woke up my husband because I was laughing so hard I had a coughing fit!! Good thing I was done with my Dr.Pepper or I would have choked on it!

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Too funny.

wife.mom.nurse said...

Okay, when I opened this on my reader, I was shaking in my boots on what pix I was going to see.

By the way, if you did not see the clip of J. Phoenix on Lettermen, you have to find it!!!!

TheCynicalOptimist said...

LOL, great post! I haven't experirenced the breastache yet, but since I am nursing, I am experience the Rockbreat, followed closely by the sagigng empty breast. Oh, and the gigantic aerola- that's a keeper I am sure. Thank you God for that little perk.

Michelle said...

Breastache......that is the new one for me! But what in the heck happened to Joaquin?? He looks really scary.

Midwest Mommy said...

Oh you are just too funny!

Sarah said...

LOL~~LOL...breastache. I love your vocab. What is up with the Joanquin picture? He looks like a Yeti. Nothing against Rhett (as I adore him), but also there are recent celebs that are sporting the pencil thin mustache which makes them look porn-starish. There IS a happy medium folks!

vsm/whirling dirvish photography said...

SNORT!! HAHA!!!
Still giggling.
Nice verbage there hon!
Very glad that all of my extremities hair is all blonde and some is a tad darker... Never had to pluck... even the brows. I'm the girl that has to put brow shadow in because otherwise it would look like I didn't have any!!

SuZ said...

I love love love love Clark Gable! He's such a MAN. :)

Funny in my mind said...

Tweezerman. Less pain.

Corey~living and loving said...

OH.MY.WORD. Thanks for the giggles. I totally NEEDED it!

Kim said...

How did I miss this post? That was a riot! I guess you really don't have to worry unless it gets long enough to peek up through your shirt collar...lol

Mrs4444 said...

Crackin' me up over here, friend...

Jaden Paige said...

AHAHAHAHAHA!! Breastache!! You totally crack me up!!
hee.

heeeeee.

Okay. *ahem* *giggle* Now then, I owe you an apology. You stopped by my poetry blog last month... I'm sorry it took me so long to get back to you, I just now realized I had comments on there! I hadn't posted in months and didn't have comment moderation on (doh!) so imagine my surprise when I found out I had unwittingly been ignoring all of you!! Next time, I promise it won't take so long for me to respond. :)

Brittany said...

Oh. My. Goodness.

It is only funny because it is TRUE!!! :) I love your word, "breastache!"

Visiting from SITS.