WARNING
I will continue to celebrate motherhood. So if breasts, birth, dilation and mother's milk makes you uncomfortable please consider yourself warned.
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Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Works for Me!!

For more survival, tips, recipes and just plain fun!!I am not the mother I thought I would be. I am so off the path that I am not even headed in my original direction.
Here is to the back roads, dead-ends and collisions that qualify motherhood for an extreme sport!!
TOP TEN THINGS I NEVER EVER THOUGHT I WOULD SAY
10. Share Baby Jesus or I'll throw him in the trash!!
9. No, Santa is not allergic to peanut butter.
8. Can you lift me up? I can't reach the spaghetti on the ceiling.
7. Yes, I can see she ate the crayons!! NOW will you flush the toilet?
6. No. Not until you finish your Cheetos.
5. I have an unopened tube of nipple cream. It's yours, just say the word.
4. Don't put Barbie's foot in my belly button.
3. Don't toilet paper the cat.
2. Well, I was feeling fancy so I shaved PAST the knee today!!!
1. I ADORE being a sleep deprived, never potty alone, stay at home mom!!

I will keep this list so that when my daughter's have children of there own I can reference it, hold my tongue and remind myself that making mistakes and taking wrong turns can be the most precious part of motherhood.

25 comments:

Jill of All Trades said...

LOL...LOL...LOL...oh my gosh the life with kids...I remember those days fondly...LOL

Idabel Oklahoma said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ohhhh we needed that today!

Amy said...

You are a hoot! I love it!!! :) Never a dull moment, right? :)

Annie said...

That is a great list! Too funny!

My Precious Peanut Designs said...

Love it Jen!! You always come up with the best stuff!! Thank you for making me laugh!!

Amy said...

OMG that was the funniest thing I have ever read!

Sarah said...

LOL!!!! 10. Share Baby Jesus or I'll throw him in the trash!!
You sound just like me :)

Keesler Chaos said...

I laughed so loud I scared my kids! Thank you!

Nicole said...

LOL I can relate to all of those! Aren't kids fun?! Thanks for stopping by and I hope to see you again. I love your blog and I will be back!

Kalei said...

Great list. Visiting from Sits...I will share this with my other mother friends.....I have a similar list starting now with "don't worry you didn't spill anything on me, I'm just leaking from my boob" funny how others don't see them as normal statements. =)

Jess said...

LOL the things we say!

TuTu's Bliss said...

Ahhh..yes I too have sprung a few new leaks since motherhood!!

KC Mom said...

I think I just laughed hot cocoa out my nose!
Merry Christmas from a fellow sitsta!

silverdot said...

so funny! I love it. And your Etsy shop is just gorgeous!!!

Tiffany said...

Very funny list!

Jenny and the Princess Peonies said...

Awesome! I know those days well! Thanks for stopping by my blog.

Wolf said...

oh my gosh! number 10! and number 2! haha. i think we all do that. why shave past the knee? :)

Cathy said...

Very funny list! Stopping by from SITS to say hello! I like your blog!

Shan said...

One that has come up a lot in the last few weeks has been "get your finger out of your nose or I will take it away" which one? "both, and you dont want to know how"
Love your list. Love your blog!

Leah said...

I love it!! Totally made my day... I mean night.

Merry SITSmas

gin said...

Great list and so true. Yes, children are very entertaining. But I'm like you -- I love every minute of it.

Drama queens mum said...

I love your list.

Melissa Lester said...

Your list was so funny! I loved it, as well as your Christmas card below. I must check out those tags, but first I'm off to see your tutus.

You asked me the other day about Picasa separating backgrounds from the subject. I think that goes beyond Picasa's limits, but I may not know all it can do. I hope this helps!

Krystyn said...

Oh, those are too funny.

And, BTW, those nipple creams make great lip balm!

SarahHub said...

This made me laugh, partly because it's so funny and partly because it's so true!