WARNING
I will continue to celebrate motherhood. So if breasts, birth, dilation and mother's milk makes you uncomfortable please consider yourself warned.
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Saturday, December 6, 2008

THE TRUTH ABOUT MARRIAGE

There is not a wife alive who has never thought, if ever so briefly, where to hide her hubby's body. Now if you are gasping in horror and praising the Lord that you obviously have a better husband than mine you are either…..
A. A newlywed
B. Living in Denial
OR
C. Married to a Saint
(If you are one of the few that answered C please don't rub it in. Husband's lives across the globe may depend on it and the last thing you want is hundreds of new widows chasing after your man.)
Speaking of saintly husbands, have you heard of the Mother Letter Project?
This husband is compiling letters from mothers across the globe to give to his wife as a gift for Christmas. Many women are all secretly thinking and hoping this is their husband. I am not one of those women. I KNOW this is NOT my husband.
It gets better. Here are his own words, "Instead of purchasing Christmas this year, our family is "creating" Christmas and donating the "difference" to a small African village. To that end, I am collecting a series of open letters-the Mother Letters-for my wife's Christmas present". Now ladies, please remember this man is accepting mother letters for his wife ONLY, not dinner invitations, propositions or marriage proposals!! SHAME ON YOU!! Besides he already politely declined my request to become his second wife.
To learn more and post your own letter click here…



DISCLAIMER:
I retain the right to tease, exaggerate and embellish my own husband's testosterone induced bad behavior. My husband is not perfect but he is perfect for me. I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea and think I'm still on the market. So for all you guys who have been searching for a leaking mommy with two kids, dry skin and a lack of will power to shave, I am NOT your girl. Please don't be too disappointed. There are many other sleep deprived, oatmeal crusted moms that would love to meet you. No I will NOT introduce you. You will just have to borrow your niece and hit up playgroup like all the other single guys.

11 comments:

Blissful Babe said...

OMG girl, you are too funny!

I need to find me one of them!!

Hey, I'm single, I can do that!
*snicker snicker snort*

TuTu's Bliss said...

LOL

I Wasn't Born a Soccer Mom said...

I am so jealous you are in Hawaii, we lived there for 2 years and I want to go back! I love Hawaii such good memories we got married, had our first son and had a lot of FUN!!!!

Yaya said...

....sigh.....


Next time you go to mac grill get a side dish of balsamic vinegar and dip the bread in that....To Die For!!!!!!!!!!

Debonaire Flea Market said...

You have such a great way of expressing your self. I love reading your posts. I thought I was the only one who felt that way about my husband at times.LOL

Cassandra said...

That is SO funny! Gotta love it! Thanks so much for entering my giveaway & stopping by my blog! Good luck!

♥Jacqueline♥ said...

LOL, Love it!!

Sara's Sweet Surprise said...

Hey it all heads south in the menopause stage when gravity takes a nose dive. It leaves you laughing (carefully)it puts a whole new spin on womanscaping and hubby hides himself at this stage of the game. LOL! I enjoyed my visit.

MammaDucky said...

I always love hearing newlyweds say "Oh, we don't fight." I try REALLY hard not to laugh at them.
We were once stationed in the middle of the mojave desert. Don't think I never thought, "hey, this would be an awesome place to dump a body." lol. Great blog.

TuTu's Bliss said...

LOL!!!

Momma Chae said...

Laughing, laughing, laughing. :)
I wish I could say my husband is one of those three types... but, nope. Sometimes I have to remind myself that he's human...